I’m a master asker.

Maybe that’s why I was called “entitled” when I attempted to negotiate my first contract as a new hospital employee. And arrogant, and selfish another time I asked, this time in a much higher position.

Leaders don’t expect women to negotiate, and when they do, we’re met with that double-bind of being liked and respected at work. They liked me before I asked for more, but now, they think I’m entitled.

Well, I am entitled. I’m entitled to being heard. I’m entitled to being paid for the value I’m bringing to this organization. And I’m entitled to fair and equitable treatment at work.

Do we as women always get those things? No – at least that’s been my experience.

There’s a new gender gap in town, and this time, women are leading the way.

The Great Resignation and Great Re-Evaluation are causing women to rethink their careers in bigger ways.

While some women are quitting their jobs for better opportunities, more flexibility, and higher pay, other women are quitting from burnout, childcare needs, or other wellbeing priorities.

Whether you're reaching the next level in your career, turning your side hustle into a full-time gig, or preparing to break into a new industry, making a career change can be challenging without support.

Women are asking for promotions and negotiating salaries at the same rate as men. We’re showing up at work, committed to our companies and careers. And this translates to more women in senior and C-suite leadership positions across the country.

Yet, women continue to be underrepresented at every level of leadership.

The 2019 McKinsey report, Women in the Workplace, revealed that men said the biggest obstacle to parity in leadership was having too few qualified women in the pipeline, while women said they are being judged by different standards.

In reality, the research shows that the biggest opportunity isn’t in breaking the glass ceiling, but in what they term the “broken rung.”

I spent my career in healthcare specializing in continuous process improvement.  My job was to help smart people solve hard problems, figure out ways to make their jobs easier, and to set the strategy for transformational change.

Continuous improvement also translates nicely to the work I do with my coaching clients. I help women take small steps every day to transform their lives, discover their strengths and purpose, and lead with intention.

I used the concept of Kaizen to help me improve my own life and find my dream career when I found myself trapped in a toxic work environment where my ideas and opinions were constantly challenged. I felt stuck and discouraged. I didn’t know where to start or what I wanted to do.

It started with a mindset shift and daily gratitude practice. From there, I started to identify my strengths and values and how I could use them to find a career I loved where I felt appreciated, valued, and respected for who I am.

I’ve always lived by the quote, “Do one thing every day that scares you.” It’s shaped my life in so many ways – from being the first person in my family to go to college, to negotiating my first salary and being called “entitled,” to leaving my lucrative corporate job to run my coaching business full time.

Doing scary things helped me become more confident, advocate for myself, expand my comfort zone, learn new things, and help other women navigate similar circumstances.

Those scary things weren’t always easy, and they often came with mistakes, uncertainty, change, fear, overwhelm and self-doubt. But they always came with a lesson that helped me grow as a leader.

Entitled.

That’s what I was called the very first time I negotiated my salary. Not from my boss, but from my boss’s boss.

I was fresh out of grad school and had just been offered a job at the hospital where I completed a 6-month administrative residency, and he was my Preceptor. In school, we were told what to expect as far as salary ranges, and the offer was very low compared to what we were told.

I wasn’t successful in negotiating that offer, but I was determined to get what I was worth. I applied to another job and got an offer from Johns Hopkins Hospital. Now, I had leverage. I told my boss about the Hopkins offer, and he asked “what will it take to get you to stay?” So I said, “A manager title and $10k more than this offer.” I was prepared, I did my homework, I had options, and I was confident in my ask. I got exactly what I asked for.

2017 was not my year.

Sure, I was making more money than I ever had. I was leading a phenomenal team of staff I also called friends. I bought my first ever *brand new* car.

But I was also burned out. Depressed. I didn’t believe in myself. I felt like a total impostor. I was sick all the time. And drinking way too much.

After grad school, I climbed the corporate ladder like my feet were on fire. I held every volunteer role I could. I said yes to EVERYTHING. I had no time left for me.

Something had to change.

Girl on girl crime is rampant.  I am consistently asked during my trainings and coaching sessions why women are often the harshest critics of other women.  The multi-layered problem is driven by the idea of scarcity: that there are only a few spots at the top for women, and in order to obtain a coveted place on the podium, you must compete with other women.  The commodifying language often used in male dominated work spaces further contribute to this myth: Which one are you?  The one from Michigan or Northwestern?  As though the leadership team is comparing tomatoes at a farmer’s market when talking about the few women on the team.

There's actually something to those magazine collages you made in summer camp as a kid.

Are you a Goal Getter? If you're anything like me, you love setting and achieving goals.

I'm super competitive with myself, so I'm always thinking about what I can do next; how can I improve? How can I reach even further?

But for some of us, goal-setting doesn't come as naturally.

Luckily, there's a simple tool you can use to set and achieve goal with ease. And I bet you already have all the supplies around your house.

“You’re not good enough.”

“No one will pay you for this.”

“Who are you to give people advice on being confident?”

These are just a few of the thoughts that run through my head on a daily basis.

As soon as I became a full-time entrepreneur, I started to question every move, every decision, every program or service I designed.

As a healthcare executive, I rarely questioned myself. I believed in my ability to be successful in my job, and I often heard great feedback on my programs and training from colleagues and supervisors.

But even though I still hear great feedback from my clients and friends, I don’t believe them.

My high school career aptitude test said I should be a fish & game warden. After frantically googling what that meant, it was clear that my responses on the “Do you like the outdoors?” section may have skewed the results.

Obviously, a test can’t tell you what your life’s work should be, but I so desperately wanted clear direction that I briefly considered this career path. Alas, a jumpy person alone in the woods does not mix well with firearms. So fish & game warden was out. On to the next idea.

Trial and error would become the theme of the next few years of my life. I changed my major multiple times in college before graduating with degrees in Economics and Marketing. I took a job in sales, got promoted twice, and quit within three years. I tried to “find myself” by traveling around Europe for a few months. You get the idea. I was literally and figuratively all over the map.

As a former hiring manager, I’ve combed through hundreds of resumes and cover letters. I’m also the go-to person in my friends and family circle when someone needs help updating theirs.

I’ll let you in on a little secret: your resume is one of the most important documents you will ever own!

It’s true – your resume can be the one thing standing between you and a job you love and your key to a prosperous and exciting future.

That’s why it’s so important to spend time crafting a concise, yet powerful resume that is tailored for the job you want.

Let’s start with the basics.

You like your job, but it doesn’t excite you anymore. You’re entering the job market but aren’t sure what you really want to do. You feel like something is somehow missing from your life.

Sound familiar?

We’re all souls having a human experience, trying to figure out why we’re on this Earth.

I’ve been there.

And from my countless existential crises, audiobooks and cups of coffee, I’ve found my life purpose. Or at least, my purpose for now.

How did I do it?

I should have been ecstatic. I was offered a promotion with the title I wanted and a $15k salary increase. Why wasn’t I jumping up and down with excitement?

Like many women, I had an idea of what it meant to be successful in the corporate world. Navigating my way through male-dominated meetings, sitting at the table ensuring my voice was heard, and climbing the corporate ladder so fast I didn’t stop to catch my breath.

This was the logical next step in my career, right? Then why didn’t I have an ounce of enthusiasm?

Shatter the Glass Ceiling Together with Lean In Circles

I sat across the table from the man who would determine my future. It was now or never.

My palms sweaty and my heart racing, I began to list all my achievements from the past three years. Finally, the words, burning on my tongue since the moment I walked in the room, slipped out and formed the sentence, “I’d like a promotion.”