Over the last few weeks, the Coronavirus went from something happening across the world, to something happening in our backyard.

The uncertainty of the pandemic creates fear, panic, and a sense of lost control. As many people have put it, this is uncharted territory.

It can be terrifying to know what to do next when our government and leaders aren’t giving us a plan.

But there’s one thing we can control: our mindset.

Because fear is only as powerful as we make it. We can choose to live in fear and panic, or we can choose to find peace and connection.

Shifting our mindsets to find peace amid chaos is one way we can take back control of this terrifying situation, take care of ourselves, and take stock of the good in our lives.

We’re all in this together.

Have you ever been told you’re bossy? Aggressive? Too much? What about too emotional? You’re too nice?

Do you struggle to find the balance between being respected and liked at work? Do you struggle to find balance at all?

If you’re like most women, you likely said yes to any (or all) of the above questions. And let’s face it: this double-edged sword of trying to hide our feminine strengths to fit into a masculine work environment is holding women back.

Women are asking for raises and getting promotions at the same rate as men, yet we have a long way to go to close the gender gap. We need a new approach to leadership, one where traditional feminine strengths are recognized and rewarded. Playing by the old rules of leadership is over.

Yet, when we try to adopt a traditionally masculine approach to leadership (i.e. authoritative rather than participative), disconnect with our emotions, and focus on our weaknesses rather than our strengths, the gap in female leaders grows wider.

It’s time to own who you are and what you bring to the table.

Women are asking for promotions and negotiating salaries at the same rate as men. We’re showing up at work, committed to our companies and careers. And this translates to more women in senior and C-suite leadership positions across the country.

Yet, women continue to be underrepresented at every level of leadership.

The 2019 McKinsey report, Women in the Workplace, revealed that men said the biggest obstacle to parity in leadership was having too few qualified women in the pipeline, while women said they are being judged by different standards.

In reality, the research shows that the biggest opportunity isn’t in breaking the glass ceiling, but in what they term the “broken rung.”

You’ve built up great skills and experience in your current role, and now you’re ready to move on to the next level.

Or maybe you’ve spent the past ten years in the same company or field, and now you’re ready to shift gears and transition to a new industry.

Or perhaps you’re struggling to keep yourself motivated at a job that doesn’t align with your values, or one where your ideas or opinions are constantly challenged.

Whatever situation you find yourself in, you’re ready to look for a new job.

You know the tactical things you need to do before starting your job search – updating your resume and LinkedIn profile, reaching out to former colleagues or mentors to learn about job opportunities, making a list of the top companies or job titles you’ll search for.

But you may be overlooking the most powerful tool in your job search arsenal: your mindset.

I’ve always lived by the quote, “Do one thing every day that scares you.” It’s shaped my life in so many ways – from being the first person in my family to go to college, to negotiating my first salary and being called “entitled,” to leaving my lucrative corporate job to run my coaching business full time.

Doing scary things helped me become more confident, advocate for myself, expand my comfort zone, learn new things, and help other women navigate similar circumstances.

Those scary things weren’t always easy, and they often came with mistakes, uncertainty, change, fear, overwhelm and self-doubt. But they always came with a lesson that helped me grow as a leader.

I hate exercising.

If you’ve been following me for awhile, you know this is true. I detest it. I avoid it at all costs. If there is an option between going to the gym or doing something else, I will always pick the other option. Especially if it involves wine.

But, I know that exercise is the one thing missing in my wellbeing routine. I know that exercise is key to preventing chronic illness and can reduce my chances of developing breast cancer (even though I have the genetic mutation that increases my risk).

I know that exercise will help me stay mindful and present and keep my energy levels high. I know it will raise my good cholesterol and lower my bad cholesterol. I know it’s a part of self-care and taking care of my body and setting the foundation for my future health.

I know all of this. So why do I still avoid it?

“Ugh, how is it I am so successful in so many areas of my life, but taking care of myself?”

Did I see a hand raise?

Are you one of those overly worked career people, who get everything done above and beyond the call of duty? Your boss praises you. Your friends love and adore you. Your family thinks the world of you. Everyone wants to be around you. The outside looks great, but you’re a freakin’ mess on the inside! If they only knew… you almost laugh, or maybe you do, out loud at the comments, “How do you do it all?” You do and you do it well, but at what cost?

I’ll be the first to admit it – I don’t always believe in myself.

My inner critic tells me I’m too young to be an expert. That I don’t know enough about business or marketing. That no one will want my services. That I’m not pretty unless I’m wearing makeup.

Sound familiar?

That nasty voice in your head that tells you you’re not good enough to do the thing you want to do is stealing your confidence.

You likely have an idea of how more confidence would impact your life – or you wouldn’t be here.

In case you need a reminder, confidence improves your chances in the dating game and in relationships. It increases our perceived physical attractiveness by others and improves our performance at work. It even improves our mental and physical health.

But we can’t live healthy, confident lives when our inner critic is screaming that we’re not enough.

So much of what we say about ourselves is negative. Affirmations give us the opportunity to choose words that help create or eliminate something in our lives, such as creating success or confidence or healthy relationships, and eliminating low self-esteem, destructive behaviors and even pain.

Affirmations help us retrain our thinking and speaking into positive patterns so we can truly transform our lives. We can get more of what we want and less of what we don’t.

But be careful because everything we say is an affirmation. Every thought, every sentence is just confirming what we want in life.

So, if you say “I’m so happy and grateful now that I lost 20 pounds,” one minute, then say “this won’t work” the next minute, which one do you think will win out? The second one!

Negative thought patterns are so deeply ingrained in all of us, and it’s really hard to break them. Practicing positive affirmations is one way to break that cycle.